would like to make a gift to all readers of this blog. A gift in these days of celebration. I just finished reading a book by Gordon Thomas on the topic of parenting. The title is "Effective Parenting". A smooth and pleasant to read book that goes a method that can also translate into other relationships, not merely one between parent - child. So it is feasible to school, the workplace, in their marriage and relationship friendly. We talk about active listening and ways to get in touch with each other without saying that are environmentally friendly. I am convinced that if some means of communication psychology, counseling skills were learned by all, we would have relations more nutritious and have a more happy and healthy and authentic. Should be made to a "reframe" its cognitive and emotional inner self that involves commitment, awareness and training. Just like when you go to the gym to keep in training the body, the same goes for "clothing" and therefore the mental relational modes - transactional.
Below is why I believe that I found in the book of Gordon and that is my gift to you readers that I do!
Happy Holidays to all / the Heat to a full 2010, Peace, Serenity and Happiness!
Andrea Duranti
The "I" to my reports
You and I have a relationship that I care and I want to keep. But each of us is a person in its own right, which has its own bisogni particolari e il diritto a soddisfarli.
Quando ti troverai in difficoltà, presterò ascolto con sincera accettazione per aiutarti a trovare le tue soluzioni, invece di farti dipendere dalle mie. Inoltre, rispetterò il tuo diritto ad avere le tue convinzioni e a perseguire i tuoi valori, per quanto possano essere diversi dai miei.
Tuttavia, se il tuo comportamento interferirà col soddisfacimento dei miei bisogni, ti dirò apertamente e onestamente in cosa mi condiziona, confidando che il rispetto per i miei bisogni e sentimenti ti spinga a cambiare quel comportamento, che per me è inaccettabile. Inoltre, se un mio comportamento sarà inaccettabile per te, spero che me lo dirai openly and honestly, so I can try to change it.
When we had to realize that neither can change to meet the needs of others, take note that there is a conflict between us and we will either solve it without resorting to the power or authority to win at the expense of others. I respect your needs, but I also respect mine. Therefore, always strive to seek a solution acceptable to both. Your needs will be satisfied and so my no one will lose, both will win.
behaving this way, you grow as a person meeting your needs, and the same will be for me. Thus, we can be a healthy relationship where we both strive to become what we can be. We will continue to relate to each other with mutual respect, love and peace.
Thomas Gordon
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